“Trying to shame me for rejecting him” – Jordan’s story

Walking up to pay for parking at a lot near work, there are couple of guys feeding money into the machine. One guy looks me up and down, says “daaaammmmnnnn” and then asks me if I’m married. I asked him why it would matter to him if I’m married or not. He says, “Well are you single, are you dating somebody?” I reply that it is none of his damn business. And he, speaking authoritatively and trying to shame me for rejecting him, responds by saying, “Oh, I see… You just don’t like black guys*, right?” And I, not really wanting to get into it with this asshole, sarcastically reply, “Yup, you’ve figured me out.” And he says, “You’d rather be with a white dude.” This is something I’ve heard so many times before when rejecting the come-ons of men – and not just men of color. If I reject a white guy I get asked if I’m a lesbian. And this pisses me off to no end. So I say back to him, “Just because I don’t want to have a conversation with some guy who just checked out my tits and then asked me if I’m single doesn’t mean I’m not into black guys. I don’t think I should have to explain myself every time someone with dick hits on me.” Not the most eloquent or even useful response, but fuck him! The look on his face was priceless and he finally shut up and left me alone. His friend giggled. And then they both walked away. What is it about warm weather that can bring out the worst in people?!   *Note from the site director: We have a strict anti-racism policy here that goes as far as taking out racial identifiers. We have made an exception here because the information is contextual to the story and actually helps to show that street harassment is not “cultural”. It is global (experienced by at least 80% of women worldwide) spanning race, nationality, age, class, religion, education-level, and political affiliation.